The Cross

This past week has been incredibly challenging.  Having round two of a root canal on Monday started it off with the expected swelling and jaw pain, and I was advised it could last up to a week.  Along with the root canal pain, I also was plagued by a horrific headache.  Being a recovering alcoholic, I try to avoid taking narcotic pain medication, but I did take some the first few days.  They zoned me out and concentration was out of the question.  I didn’t like the feeling either (thank goodness!).  The family has been wonderful helping out around the house, but I still needed to prepare for a healing retreat that I’m facilitating tomorrow.  Knowing the pain medication made me loopy (more than usual), I stopped taking it so I could get the materials organized.   

Once everything was put together, I felt compelled to make a wooden cross and decorate it for the AGAPE ceremony we plan to use during the program.  We have a cross at our other retreat facility I could have borrowed, but as I said, I felt compelled.  I am not “artsy-craftsy” by any means, in fact, my art teacher in college asked me to drop his class.  But ... I had an image in my mind and wasn’t going to let that memory dissuade me.  After dad and I had found some wood in the garage, we took turns sawing and made the cross, then I took to the road to find the perfect flowers and other supplies needed.  

After the project was completed (it took two days), I realized focusing on the cross brought me so much joy I forgot about the pain.  

Only in the Cross of Christ will we receive power when we are powerless. 

We will find strength when we are weak. 

We will experience hope when our situation is hopeless. 

Only in the Cross is there peace for our troubled hearts. 
~Michael Youssef

 This is just a portion.  It

stands about 5'. It might not be a masterpiece,

but with my limited talent...

 

Where is the coverage? Where is the outrage? Where is the truth?

The following is a commentary I submitted to the local newspaper as a call to action.  I seriously doubt it will be printed as the liberal media is doing its best to downplay and justify the atrocities at Planned Parenthood.  Feel free to share.

The release of undercover videos shows not only the haggling for body parts of aborted babies but the true barbarity and callousness of its employees.  We as a nation should be outraged, sickened and demanding action against the number one provider of abortions. 

The pro-choice politicians are lying when they say defunding (I would prefer closing) Planned Parenthood would hurt women and take away much-needed health services.  That is NOT true.  There are more than 9,000 Community Health Centers that provide the same, if not, more compassionate service than Planned Parenthood in comparison to their 700.  In fact, Planned Parenthood doesn’t even provide mammograms.  They refer them out.  The only difference between Community Health Centers and Planned Parenthood is that Community Health Centers do not provide abortions. 

The truth be told, Planned Parenthood does hurt women and the videos are opening the eyes of post-abortive women about what happened to their babies.  Yes, I said BABIES.  Not tissue, not a clump of cells, not fetal cadavers or all the other terms used to dehumanize.  BABIES.  Even staff at PP during the recorded videos were heard saying,  “babies,” “twins,” “it’s a boy.” If everyone out there watched these videos, they would see the arms, legs, feet, hands and faces of these precious children.

I know first-hand the anger, pain and despair experienced by post-abortive women, the fathers, etc. after viewing the videos. I am post-abortive and I was mortified.  Women have been betrayed.  Betrayed by an organization that makes millions using dehumanizing phrases, not advising there could be emotional and psychological side effects (addiction, depression, self-harm, etc.) … then making more money selling parts of an aborted child. Betrayed by an organization that could suggest other alternatives such as adoption or a pregnancy resource center instead of telling women “It’s not a baby,” to get them to abort, then say, “In a few days you’ll be back to normal.” There is no normal after an abortion.  There might be relief at first, but there will be grief, remorse, shame, and self-hatred.  Some may say they don’t feel bad about their abortion and my response to them is that denial is very common, I lived in it for years, but eventually the feelings surface and the results can be devastating. 

Please do not turn a blind eye to these videos.  They are graphic, I agree, but necessary to uncover the truth.  Most importantly, do not hide your pain, despair, revulsion or rage.  Use it to stop Planned Parenthood’s barbarity by demanding the press provide full coverage of what is going on…not candy coating it or using other stories like the death of an animal (sad as it is) to ignore the truth.  Use it by voting out politicians that receive contributions from Planned Parenthood.  Use it to stop the desentization of today’s culture of death.  

 

And I will close with this beautiful prayer written by Father Frank Pavone:
 

     Father, you have created us in body and soul
To honor you and our neighbor
And to receive honor and respect in return.

Our bodies are sacred.
They reflect you, our Creator.
And we hold sacred
The bodies of all the children in the womb.

Lord, we are saddened
That these children are being killed,
And saddened again
That their body parts are being harvested and sold.

Have mercy on our nation.
Have mercy on those who are perpetrating these evils.
As more and more people become aware of this,
Turn their hearts towards you,
The Fountain of life and love.

Give consolation to all who have had abortions,
And give wisdom to our public officials
That they may respond adequately
To the corruption found in the abortion industry.

Grant that we,
The People of Life and the People of Mercy,
May recommit ourselves to building a nation
Without abortion and without the many evils that flow from us.

May we choose life;
May we choose mercy;
May we choose your Kingdom!
Through Christ our Lord. Amen.

 

--Rev. Frank Pavone, National Director, Priests for Life

 

 

 

 

Planned Parenthood Expose' and Memories

Once again I will be addressing the videos that recently exposed Planned Parenthood’s heinous and inhumane practices.  Hopefully, the recent injunction against the release of future videos will be determined unjustified and the public will finally see the “real” Planned Parenthood.

Watching the videos is heartbreaking and causing significant emotional turmoil.  It is also unveiling more memories of my abortions that I believe God now feels I can handle. (He has more confidence in me than I have!)

More memories surfaced after I felt compelled to contact a friend who was around when I had my abortions.  I couldn't recall (more like blocked out) if my second abortion was at my health provider 's outpatient clinic or Planned Parenthood.  She remembered not only where, but how I described the experiences. I was thrust, once more, into a period of self-loathing, grief and sadness.  Sadly, she still believes I did the right thing, but then just like many others who encourage abortion, she may just be hiding her own pain.  (I pray, in time, our conversation opens her eyes and heart - I'll be there for her.) 

My first abortion was provided by my OB/GYN.  I have always remembered not being advised of possible emotional or psychological side effects and a total absence of compassion.  What I hadn't remembered was the fact he invited two male interns into the room to observe the procedure.  He asked my permission, of course, but I didn’t want them in there … I was already frightened and embarrassed.  Did I say no?  Nope.  I was afraid he would get angry and do something that would hurt me.  I know now that wouldn’t have happened, but I feel he took advantage of my vulnerability for a “teaching” moment.  I remember them conversing about what was going on amongst themselves, while I laid on the table humiliated and exposed.  As I left the office there was a sense of relief I was no longer pregnant, but that feeling only came after I had a few drinks under my belt.  

The second abortion was provided by Planned Parenthood in Seattle, Washington.  My friend said I chose that route because of my first experience and because they were “specialists” in abortion, I expected more compassion and understanding.  WRONG   Again, I was not advised of the possible side-effects.  The only assurance I received was when they told me it was a “simple” procedure and the line they are best known for…..”It’s just tissue.”  No one held my hand, gave me any comfort at all, and as I share when I speak at pro-life events … they treated the procedure more like having a splinter, not a baby removed. I left the clinic once again feeling dirty and worthless. 

Deep in the recesses of my heart, I knew what I was doing was wrong, but forced myself to believe the rhetoric of the pro-abort community to assuage my guilt and shame. By hiding from the truth I suffered the consequences for many, many years….alcoholism, depression and promiscuity which eventually led to my becoming suicidal. 

Through God’s grace, I was guided to a healing program and inspired to help other women and men that are suffering from their decision to abort. 

So, in effect, although watching the videos arouses more pain and remorse, I am grateful the truth is being revealed to the public as well as myself.  Recalling more detail of my abortions strengthens my resolve to do whatever it takes to not only share the love and mercy of God to those who made or supported the decision to abort, but once and for all stop the annihilation of innocence.