SOME FOOD FOR THOUGHT

I saw this posted on Facebook and it was a wonderful reminder.....

A young couple moves into a new neighborhood. The next morning while they are eating breakfast, the young woman sees her neighbor hanging the wash outside. "That laundry is not very clean; she doesn't know how to wash correctly. Perhaps she needs better laundry soap." Her husband looks on, remaining silent. Every time her neighbor hangs her wash to dry, the young woman makes the same comments. A month later, the woman is surprised to see a nice clean wash on the line and says to her husband: "Look, she's finally learned how to wash correctly. I wonder who taught her this? " The husband replies, "I got up early this morning and cleaned our windows." And so it is with life... What we see when watching others depends on the clarity of the window through which we look

HAVE A BLESSED DAY!

Mini-Christmas Concert - St. Timothy's Choir - Christmas Eve

Thought I would post more videos of the music the parish at St. Timothy's Catholic Church – Escondido, CA were blessed to hear on Christmas Eve.

I sincerely apologize for people walking in front of the camera from time to time and some movements, I'm not a professional by any means, but wanted to share the beauty of the music.

Our talented Adult Choir and Christmas Orchestra, directed by the amazing Marion (Mimi) Delano Holtz, accompanied by the awesome Dr. Joe Valent on piano and organ. The wonderful orchestra: Strings: Susan, Mark & Michael Doering, Anna Piland. Wind Instruments: Eleanor Tibbals-Pennington, Don Pennington

Just Click on the Song Title - Enjoy and Merry Christmas!

O HOLY NIGHT - SOLOIST DICK WEEDE

NIGHT OF PEACE

INFANT HOLY, INFANT LOWLY

IN THE BLEAK MIDWINTER

GENTLE MARY LAID HER CHILD

A Christmas Prayer and Beautiful Song by the Church of St. Timothy Choir

Enjoy this beautiful song,

"All is Well"

Performed by the Church of St. Timothy Choir

while Baby Jesus is being placed in the manger.

Christmas Eve

Have a Blessed Christmas!

EXPERIENCE OF A LIFETIME

Thought I would take a trip down memory lane today...just for a change of pace....

Enjoy!

Award show seat-fillers are “commoners” that fill seats vacated by an attendee that leaves to accept an award, go to the restroom, etc.  Producers of these events do not want any empty seats when the cameras are rolling.  

On Thursday evening, March 8, 2001, my husband and I received a phone call from a friend of ours. He was all excited and asked if we were sitting down. He had submitted our names as seat-fillers for the Screen Actor's Guild awards and we were selected. WHAT??????  We went on-line to see if it was just another one of his jokes but lo and behold, staring me right in the face was an e-mail from the seat-filler company with the official invitation and requirements. Being a formal event we were to dress accordingly.... The show was on Sunday (a little short notice????) in L.A. – a two hour drive. Keep in mind, we were not ones to have formal wear at the ready in our closet so we needed to go shopping. Because we both worked, we were limited to Friday night and Saturday to find something that would make us blend in with the Hollywood crowd. Mike rented a tuxedo and I finally found an evening gown at J.C. Penney's where I'm sure many stars buy their evening wear, right?

On Sunday morning we wore t-shirts and jeans to Los Angeles then found a McDonald's close to our destination and changed in the bathroom. It was funny seeing the faces of people as we walked in like regular people and walked out like, well, movie stars! After arriving at the Shrine Auditorium we were escorted to the staging area. To be readily identified as seat-fillers we were given wristbands (mine did not match my gown). From two o'clock until 4:45 we stood, listening to the "ringmaster" explain the seat-filler code of conduct. I don't know why, but we were not furnished chairs. We were instructed to take any cameras back to our vehicles as pictures were not allowed. We were not to speak to the actors unless spoken to, we were not to eat, drink, or ask for autographs. (Well,dang, why be there?) We could hear the crowds outside clapping and yelling as celebrities walked the red carpet (here we are all dressed up and no red carpet for us??). The ringmaster finally announced it was “showtime”. After standing for almost three hours the excitement about who we would be sitting with had been tempered...we just wanted to sit. Our feet were killing us.

We were herded into the auditorium. Mike and I were lucky to be seated at the same table, right by the stage...and there sat Willem Dafoe. He stood up, introduced himself and shook our hands. Evidently he didn't see the wristbands because as we sat down he offered us a glass of wine. Sadly we admitted to him that we were lowly seat-fillers and were prohibited from partaking. He apologized then started to chat with us like we were old friends. What a nice man. The food looked absolutely mahhvelous and we were definitely tempted to take a bite.  I hated to see it just sit there knowing it would end up in the garbage, but rules are rules. So we just sat there and tried not to drool while the everyone else ate. Along with our new best friend Willem, our table included Anne Heche and Cary Elwes. There were others at the table as well that looked familiar but their names escaped me. 

During the meal and throughout the evening I scanned the room and was definitely star-struck. Patty Duke, Dennis Weaver, Tom Hanks, James Woods, Julia Roberts, Benjamin Bratt, the West Wing cast - the list goes on and on. Sitting at the table next to us was Brian Dennehy. I was one of his biggest fans and my heart skipped a million beats. He was much more handsome in person and just as burly as he looked on television. I wondered what would happen if I casually walked over, plopped myself down on his lap and gave him a smooch, but I was a coward. Anyway, I'm sure my husband wouldn't have been pleased and the ringmaster would have taken me by the wristband and thrown me out. (I think it would have been worth it!)

Right before the curtain went up, Chris O'Donnell came to our table for a chat with Willem and took Mike's seat. So here I was sandwiched between two handsome actors with Brian Dennehy within kissing distance....life couldn't get any better!  Mike had disappeared into a sea of people scrambling to find a table. The show began and I kept waiting to be moved, but no one claimed my seat; in fact, I sat there all evening long.

Because of the table's location to the stage, the view was awesome! I was able to see entertainment and winners up close and personal. It was the year one of my other favorites, Julia Roberts, won for Erin Brokovich. She definitely was (and still is) a pretty woman. Benjamin Bratt wasn't bad either!

I had no idea where Mike was, but found out later he was playing musical chairs. There was an empty seat at The Soprano's table and he sat there for about fifteen minutes then got booted by James Gandolfini. He rotated around tables filled mostly with directors and producers after that. Right before the last award, he ended up standing in the bar area of the theater with a group of celebrities that included Sela Ward, Jesse Green and Calista Flockhart. They were readying themselves for a quick exit once the curtain closed ...avoiding the mass exodus.

After the show ended, I walked through the throng of Hollywood's elite, secretly wishing I had a discreet 007 camera built in to my evening gown to memorialize everything.  Once I found Mike, we started to exit and a young man took my arm and started to guide us to the after-party. That would have been great fun but I knew the ringmaster was probably at the entrance of the party just waiting to grab interlopers for an embarrassing bounce. (Again, maybe it would have been worth it!)

It was an evening we'll never forget. We thought about staying on the active seat-filler list, even applying for the Oscar's, but after careful consideration, decided once was enough. Doing it again would take away the uniqueness of the experience so we retired the wristbands and returned to our usual award-watching venue...on our sofa, in pajamas, eating pizza.

The Night Before Christmas - For Authors

It's the night before Christmas, with laptop in tow

I sneak to the window to watch falling snow.

The calm, peaceful scene should inspire me to write

a couple of chapters before I call it a night.

The ticking I hear from the grandfather clock

is a deadline reminder which brings writer's block.

The words are all floating around in my brain,

and I can't seem to catch them, I'm going insane!

The screen of my laptop continues to shine,

it may as well light up a “vacancy” sign.

Maybe spiked coffee would help in my plight

as my keyboard is waiting for fingers to light.

Sipping my beverage, enjoying the view,

should help in releasing at least one word...or two.

The tick-tock continues, I sigh in defeat,

but because of a noise, I slow my retreat.

Then all of a sudden a vision appears,

if it isn't a sleigh pulled by eight cute reindeer!

Here comes Santa himself, now I know I'm insane,

I have to be dreaming, or the coffee's to blame.

With a strong jolly voice he starts to speak,

assuring me things aren't really that bleak.

He says, "No need to panic, the words will come soon,

if your focus is changed from the deadline that looms.

Look through that window, embrace what you see,

take it all in, from that block you'll be freed".

He gives me a wink as he fades out of sight, and

says, “Merry Christmas, now sit down and write!”

A Story of Mercy

Have you ever had someone tell you, "You should write a book"?  That's exactly what happened to me.  Friends encouraged me and I firmly believe the Holy Spirit was nudging me as well --- and not just any book, a book about me.

I'm sure you're wondering what astounding feats I performed, lives saved or exotic places visited.  Are you trying to remember seeing me on Biography or my face on People Magazine?  Wonder no more my friends, the answers are coming in a book being released next week - "And God Still Loves Me".   Here's a brief synopsis:

We all at times wish we could turn back the hands of time and have a "do-over", and I was desperate for one.  I wanted to forget and erase the pain inflicted on my family, friends and myself.  Most of all I wanted to die.  This book is about a lost soul who shunned God and hurt everyone in her path.  It's about a sinner who has fallen short but through God's love, grace and mercy has come around to know God's glory.

Don't go looking for my story on re-runs of Biography or old issues of People Magazine.  I'm not a celebrity --  I'm just a regular person, raised in a loving, Christian home that chose to live a a life of reckless abandon suffering consequences along the way. It wasn't until I sobered up and welcomed Christ back into my life that I was able to peel away the many layers of who I was, and embrace the past with faith and understanding. Writing this book was an exorcism of sorts. 

I pray the finished product not only reflects God's infinite mercy, but inspires hope in the hearts of those who feel they are beyond redemption.  God really does still love us!

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While patiently waiting for my book's release, check out what fellow author Mark Miller has to say about his recent writing projects...he's my guest blogger tomorrow.  You won't be disappointed!

HAVE A BLESSED DAY!

Light and Life

Luke 1:34-38 But Mary said to the angel, “How can this be, since I have no relations with a man?” And the angel said to her in reply, “The holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. Therefore the child to be born will be called holy, the Son of God. And behold, Elizabeth, your relative, has also conceived a son in her old age, and this is the sixth month for her who was called barren; for nothing will be impossible for God.” Mary said, “Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word.” Then the angel departed from her.

I attended a Light and Life fundraiser recently.  The title of the fundraiser is appropriately named as it raises funds to purchase mobile ultrasound machines for pregnancy resource centers. Ultrasound is an instrumentality which transforms sound into images, light which “pierces the darkness,” illuminating the life of the unborn baby in the mother's womb, transforming the perceptions of an abortion-minded mother or father through a light of life – the images of their son or daughter.

It was a successful event and the speakers were outstanding.  One stood out though with a comment that was very insightful and thought-provoking..."Who best to represent an unplanned pregnancy than the Blessed Virgin Mary"?  Wouldn't it be wonderful if everyone reacted to an unplanned pregnancy as Mary did by saying, "Yes"?  

With my wonderful
husband, Michael.

With Leslie Brunolli at the Light and Life 
Fundraiser. Leslie and I work together at 
Rachel's Hope Post-Abortion Healing Retreats
and Silent No More Awareness.

The beautiful view from
the Sheraton Resort in Carlsbad -
location of fundraiser.

 

HAVE A BLESSED DAY!

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Christmas Past

When I was married to my son's father (may he rest in peace), we had three young boys in our home for Christmas...Bobby and Don's two sons from a previous marriage, Richard and Tommy.  I chuckle remembering what we did to keep them believing in Santa. We would wait until they fell asleep and we would go around the house and jingle bells and Don would Ho, Ho, Ho outside their bedroom windows.  Having them still believe made us feel younger!   Each Christmas would also have it's own theme...one year it would be horse "stuff" (we lived on a ranch) then the next would be sporting goods, and so on.  But whatever the theme there was always the gag gifts.  Each year we would get each boy something really silly.  A Barbie, a My Little Pony kite, a Strawberry Shortcake pillow, etc. ....I think they looked forward to those gifts more than anything.  

It wasn't until recently my son informed me they were not fooled at our feeble attempts to be Santa but it made them happy because we tried so hard and they secretly cherished those silly gifts, not because they would ever use them, but because we put so much effort in making them laugh.  What he said was a Christmas gift I'll carry forever.

HAVE A BLESSED DAY!

  

A Ministry of Healing

"Rachel is weeping for her children.  She refuses to be comforted for her children are no more.  Thus says the Lord:  Wipe the tears from your eyes.  The sorrow you have shown shall have its reward."  (Jeremiah 31:15-17).

While getting things ready for a 2014 retreat planning meeting with my friend Leslie, Director of Rachel's Hope/Escondido, I thought I would write a little about what it is and what we do.

The retreat program was created by Rosemary and Jim Benefield and follows the message of the Catholic church.  It offers Catholic or Catholic-friendly post-abortive women an avenue for healing. The program provides a loving, compassionate and confidential atmosphere for them to share the grief, shame and regret they have hidden in their hearts and an opportunity to ask for and receive forgiveness. 

We currently hold retreats in three locations:  San Diego, Escondido and El Centro. We also offer a non-denominational program at the Los Colinas Women's Correctional Facility.  

I work with Leslie at the Escondido retreat center. Held in a former convent house, the program starts on Friday evening and goes through Sunday afternoon. Staying together for the complete weekend promotes bonding as all have experienced the same emotional and spiritual strife; it also allows participants to focus on their healing and not be distracted. Leaders also stay overnight to be available for one-on-one counsel if issues arise after the women retire for the evening. We utilize music and a multitude of exercises and prayers to guide them through the healing process. Our retreats conclude with a beautiful dedication ceremony for their babies.

I am so blessed to be involved in this ministry.  I praise God after each retreat as I see women walk into the house in emotional and spiritual agony and walk out with hope, a healed soul and a true understanding of God's mercy.

How it began....

God's Plan is Bigger Than Our Own

by Rosemary Benefield RN, MA & MPC

Executive Director, Rachel's Hope

Taken from the Rachel's Hope Website

It seems that whenever God has a job for me, he first puts the desire in my heart. It was while working in the Pregnancy Counseling Office at Mercy Hospital in San Diego, counseling pre- and post-abortive women, that I felt a desire to do more. It came to my attention than many Catholic women who have had an abortion needed healing in this area. I referred them to an Evangelical Post-Abortion Healing Workshop. However, many Catholic women won't attend a program if it is not Catholic. So this desire was realized with the birth of "Rachel's Hope After-Abortion Healing and Reconciliation retreats for Catholic Women ( or Catholic Friendly)." My husband, Jim Benefield, MFCC, gives healing workshops for men who have had an abortion experience. The Holy Spirit opened many doors for me, and sent me supportive people, in the founding of Rachel's Hope.

We are starting a follow-up program in 2014, appropriately called, "The Healing Continues". This retreat will be more contemplative which will give the women a chance to reflect on the changes that have occurred in their lives since the original retreat.  We are quite excited about this new endeavor and hope it enhances the healing they have already received.

Rosemary, Me & Leslie

HAVE A BLESSED DAY!

Regions of Regret

When I was writing “And God Still Loves Me”, my friend and mentor from Rachel's Hope suggested I use an article written by her husband, the late Jim Benefield, LMFT, as it reflected what I had gone through. The article, “Turning Your Lifelong Regrets into Immeasurable Graces", is a wonderful testament of God's mercy and provides hope and healing for those living in shame due to their past. The following is an excerpt of that article.

The Regions of Regret

Some have said, “I was in the wrong place at the wrong time”, or, “I wish that I was born at a different time”, but the bare fact remains. What has been done cannot be physically undone. Once an act is realized, that act remains a part of real-time history, never to be erased. In the progressive momentum of time, one's circumstances may change for the better or worse according to one's opportunities. And even though some original acts that can be rectified by succeeding opportunities, other regrettable acts leave a lasting legacy of shame, self-hatred, anger and depression.

These are the regions of regret. “If only I had a second chance”, “I wish I could take everything back that I said”, “I'm so sorry that I had the abortion; hit my wife; sexually abused my child; have to go to jail because I burglarized a car; ever used drugs; punched my mom; received a sexually transmitted disease because of promiscuous sex at such an early age.” Often times the consequences of an act can follow throughout one's life without relief from emotional pain because one cannot undo what has been done within the limits of linear time and physical distance.

When people lose their ability to focus on the present with hope for the future because of the traumas and failures of the past, they easily become prey to depression and despair. In their self-absorption, hopeless people cannot see God and what He might be doing through the events that they regret. Their anger and even hatred towards others hold them back from looking into the merciful eyes of God.

Thankfully, Jesus is not bound by linear time or physical distance: “Jesus is the same yesterday, today and forever.” By his divine-human power, Jesus has borne all of our sorrows. By his divine-human power, Jesus has perfectly atoned for each and every one of our sins. Moreover, Jesus has prepared a perfect life for each of us. As St. Paul wrote in his letter to the Ephesians, “We are God's handiwork, created in Christ Jesus for good works that He has prepared for us beforehand that we should walk in them” (Ephesians 2:10). Jesus has gone before us to offer the Father all of our sins, washed in his Precious Blood. For this present moment, and for each future present moment of our lives, Jesus has prepared a perfect act of love for us to do together with Him, for the glory of the Father, and for the good of all souls, past, present, and future. Making friends with past losses and regrets by purposefully giving them back to God with Jesus and placing them in his providential hand opens the way to total freedom from the bondage of living in regrets.

Cedars of Lebanon, Newsletter of the John Paul II Institute of Christian Spirituality

June 2001

HAVE A BLESSED DAY!

Feel His Presence

I was driving to work a few years ago and listening to Christmas music on my radio and a song came on that literally brought me to tears.  The innocence of the children's voices and the beautiful music brought me to where I was wrapped in Jesus' loving arms.  It filled my soul with a peace that goes beyond description.  

Close your eyes and listen ...

HAVE A BLESSED DAY!

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